Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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