so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize