he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
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