im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
