**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Randomize