Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Randomize
