I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
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