I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
someone get that fucking seahorse.
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
