And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize
