my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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