Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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