I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
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