so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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