We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize
