Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Drunk is a universal language darling
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
