so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
