Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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