I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Randomize
