I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
