I love having hate sex.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Randomize
