I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
Randomize
