You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
We just shotgunned beers for America
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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