No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
