Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Randomize
