I hate all girls vehemently.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Randomize
