OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
