I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
