Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Randomize
