i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
Randomize
