ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
i wish my penis had a tongue
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Why are your pants in the freezer?
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
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