Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
