Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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