Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
Small penises have feelings too.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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