i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Randomize
