Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
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