she told me i tasted like america
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
