Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
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