You just made me feel so damn special
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
