I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
