i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
