just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Randomize
