Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
