How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
