You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Kareoke will never be a sober sport
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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