if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I smell like Dick and happiness
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize