i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Randomize
