She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
