I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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