I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
