genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
