And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
